Rent is either 4 shillings a week or can be worked out in organ trade.
We have all modern conveniences - wireless telegraph, refridgeration, scream mufflers, and complimenting Jacob's Ladders, built-in space saving Murphy Orphans.
NO ROBOT PETS! MANIMALS NEED NOT APPLY!
Opium smokers welcome, no tobacco on premises. Must be employed, responsible, and bat-shit insane.
We like: klezmer music, the complete works of Sousa, Tuven throat singing, and Richard Hell & the Voidoids.
We hate: Tuven throat singing, barbershop quartets, quintets & sextuplets, and hateful free-form jazz.
No deposit required, unless bringing personal Death-Ray.
Please contact Professor Eugene Fluffypuff at Klondike-67-5309
