This perfidious poundcake is brought to you by the Cloister Sisters' Doilies For Any Occasion. The world is a terrible wasteland pockmarked with the hideous and insane; aesthetic nightmares that can only be saved by a lacy disc of dainty fabric. Yes, any horrible sight can be put out of mind with the proper 'Doily for any Occasion'. Pug faced child? Cover his shame. Pile of dog business? Make that business a classy affair! Cast off meat processing facility? Yes, we make a doily that big, and there's even holes for the sulphur jets. The Cloister Sisters' Doilies For Any Occasion. What are they even for, anyway!?!
And! Remember now, in the densely humid days of this, our moist summer season, who truly has been making it impossible for you to breath for, well, over a century? Dr. Feelgood's Tubercular Confectionary. Ask for it, from the family gathered around your sickbed, by name.
As always, the Clockwork Cabaret forgot the one word, the important word, the utterance of power that would have forever sealed the ancient perversity of WCOM LP Chapel Hill & Carrboro. Now, let radio cooking shows & outdoor festival news be your DOOM! DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!
