This cover of every show up to this point is brought to you by Wilmer Jumpsnort's Automated Mustache Twirler. Are your hands never free long enough to gloat properly over widows you've tied to the railroad tracks? When the mounties are in hot pursuit, are your arms pumping furiously as you run, leaving no time to accentuate your melodramatic cackling? Enter... the Automated Mustache Twirler! Simply attach it to your top hat or flight cap and your hands will be free for devious wringing while our amazing apparatus does all the facial hair molesting for you! (Not responsible for loss of lips.)
And... Does your domestic situation leave something to be desired? Do you long to steal away from the missus and retreat to a secluded bungalow and throw yourself into the sterile steel grasp of an illicit automatron lover, where she will whisper in your ear, "IF LOVING YOU IS WRONG, I DO NOT WANT TO BE RIGHT"? It's your lucky day! From the makers of Robot-Wife, it's Robot Mistress! She comes with all of the attachments of your Robot-Wife, but she's actually willing to use them! Robot Mistress, the mistress you only pay for once!
As always, The Clockwork Cabaret is better than the original version WCOM LP-FM Chapel Hill & Carrboro, which was only in it for the money anyway.
And... Does your domestic situation leave something to be desired? Do you long to steal away from the missus and retreat to a secluded bungalow and throw yourself into the sterile steel grasp of an illicit automatron lover, where she will whisper in your ear, "IF LOVING YOU IS WRONG, I DO NOT WANT TO BE RIGHT"? It's your lucky day! From the makers of Robot-Wife, it's Robot Mistress! She comes with all of the attachments of your Robot-Wife, but she's actually willing to use them! Robot Mistress, the mistress you only pay for once!
As always, The Clockwork Cabaret is better than the original version WCOM LP-FM Chapel Hill & Carrboro, which was only in it for the money anyway.
